Thinking on this quote from Philip Yancey:

If we insist on visible proofs from God we may well prepare the way for a permanent state of disappointment. True faith does not so much attempt to manipulate God to do our will as it does to position us to do God’s will.

From Disappointment with God, p 242

Permalink | Leave a comment  »

The best plots contain the element of surprise. Whether it be a mystery novel, an animated cartoon, a poem, a movie, sonnet, or a personal relationship – those that have an unexpected turn for the better or for the worst, always keep us glued to our seats.

And so it is true for the Gospels, indeed for the whole Bible. It is also true for our lives. God is a god of surprises, who takes the impossible and makes it a moment in time that can stretch across generations. God knows that had we no surprises we would have no joy – and joy is at the heart or blessings.

Have you ever experienced blessings that were expected. Or, let me put it this way if you thought a blessing was coming, once it did come as a blessing, was it just the way you had played it out in your mind…or was it even better?!

Here’s a what Jesus said about those who would be blessed:

Matthew 5:1-12 (The Beatitudes)

1Now when he saw the crowds, he went up on a mountainside and sat down. His disciples came to him, 2and he began to teach them saying:
 3"Blessed are the poor in spirit,
      for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
 4Blessed are those who mourn,
      for they will be comforted.
 5Blessed are the meek,
      for they will inherit the earth.
 6Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
      for they will be filled.
 7Blessed are the merciful,
      for they will be shown mercy.
 8Blessed are the pure in heart,
      for they will see God.
 9Blessed are the peacemakers,
      for they will be called sons of God.
10Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness,
      for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
11"Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. 12Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.

These are the people whom we would least expected to receiving blessing – for the very reason that they are blessed: they are poor, they mourn, they are hungry and thirsty, they are persecuted. God somehow turns the tables. It’s not because we don’t deserve blessing; God’s blessing is totally “his” and the blessing is not based on expectations. Blessings are not something we can earn or strive for, only something conferred upon us in surprising unanticipated volume, form, timing, qualitiy and extraordinariness.

How has God surprised you today? If it’s come from his hand, it is a blessing.

Permalink | Leave a comment  »

   (5210 KB)
Listen on posterous

Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt
Who am I, that the Bright and Morning Star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart

Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are

I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
Vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours, I am Yours

Who am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love and watch me rise again
Who am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me

Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are

I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
Vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours

Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are

I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
Vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours

I am Yours
Whom shall I fear
Whom shall I fear
'Cause I am Yours
I am Yours

Permalink | Leave a comment  »

In the Bible, in chapter 4 of the Book of  Acts, we read of one of those literally earth-shaking events experienced by the early Church:

[31] After they [the apostles Peter and John] prayed, the place where they were meeting was shaken. And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and spoke the word of God boldly. [32] All the believers were one in heart and mind. No one claimed that any of their possessions was their own, but they shared everything they had. [33] With great power the apostles continued to testify to the resurrection of the Lord Jesus. And God's grace was so powerfully at work in them all [34] that there were no needy persons among them. For from time to time those who owned land or houses sold them, brought the money from the sales [35] and put it at the apostles' feet, and it was distributed to anyone who had need.

Most people in the church today are familiar with this passage as a model for living in community as followers of Jesus Christ: being one in heart and mind, sharing possessions, meeting each others’ needs. Isn’t that our ideal and goal to live in such harmony and with mutual love for one another? It certainly is mine. The world would be such a better place if we did.

However, it was not until rereading this passage today that I realized I had missed the first point, the first goal the preempts and predicates the goal of living in community. It is this in verse 33: And God’s grace was so powerfully at work in them all.

God’s Grace. That is the key, the engine, the nuclear power that drives blessing – and not our good intentions or understanding, compassion, mercy, kindness, or love. Blessing does not start with us. Blessing starts with God and His grace working powerfully in us. It is His grace that turns our world upside down. His grace that moves us to do the unheard of. Grace that draws us together, makes us of one heart and mind, looses selfishness from our clenched fists. It God’s grace that gives us a testimony of any kind. It is the God’s grace that we have a redeemed, resurrected and changed life. And it is because of God’s tremendous, unmerited grace toward us that we can bless anyone.

It’s all because of God. And that, friends, is earth-shaking.

Permalink | Leave a comment  »

   (8636 KB)
Listen on posterous

All that I need is to be with You and in the quiet hear Your voice.

Word of God Speak
I'm finding myself at a loss for words
And the funny thing is it's okay
The last thing I need is to be heard
But to hear what You would say

[CHORUS]
Word of God speak
Would You pour down like rain
Washing my eyes to see
Your majesty
To be still and know
That You're in this place
Please let me stay and rest
In Your holiness
Word of God speak

I'm finding myself in the midst of You
Beyond the music, beyond the noise
All that I need is to be with You
And in the quiet hear Your voice

[sung by Big Daddy Weave]

Permalink | Leave a comment  »

On Day 9 of our annual 40-day church fast, a brief list of some of the things I’ve learned about blessing lately.

1. I’m blessed when I slow down to hear Jesus and appreciate other.
2. Blessing doesn’t depend upon quantity or siz.
3. Blessing sometimes requires cracking open a hard, protective shell: Mine!
4. I can bless even when I’m grouchy; it just doesn’t look as pretty.
5. Being able to forgive is a huge blessing.
6. Asking for forgiveness blesses me even more than the person I’m asking forgiveness of.
7. An authentic affirmation is the blessing that can make another person’s day.
8. Blessing that involves creativity makes the reward all the sweeter for me.
9. Sometimes the best blessing I can give someone is to not say anything at all.
10. Blessedness lies in being connected to God through the Holy Spirit.
11. Blessing someone else is an act I do in conjunction with God and never apart from Him.
12. I feel blessed by even the smallest thank you.
13. If I dig down with God, beneath the pain there’s always blessing just waiting to escape.
14. The well of blessing Jesus draws from can never be emptied, never runs dry.
15. God loves to bless his children. If we’re receiving little, perhaps we are simply acting like adults.

Pamela A. Chun
©October 25, 2009
Please reprint only with permission.

Permalink | Leave a comment  »

   (7705 KB)
Listen on posterous

As the Deer
By Marty Nystrom (sung in this rendition by Salvador)

As the deer panteth for the water
So my soul thirsts after thee
You alone are my heart's desire
And I long to worship thee

Chorus
You alone are my strength my shield
To You, O Lord, does my spirit yield
You alone are my heart's desire
And I long to worship thee

[Additional verses]
You're my friend and You are my brother,
Even though you are a king.
I love you more thank any other,
So much more than anything.

I want You more than gold or silver,
Only You can satisfy.
You alone are the real joy Giver,
And the apple of my eye.

Permalink | Leave a comment  »

For me, personally, prayer becomes more and more a way to listen to the blessing. I have read and written much about prayer, but when I go to a quiet place to pray, I realize that the real “work” of prayer is to become silent and listen to the voice that says good things about me. This might sound self-indulgent, but, in practice, it is a hard discipline. I am so afraid of being cursed, of hearing that I am no good or not good enough, that I quickly give in to the temptation to start talking and to keep talking in order to control my fears.

- Henri Nouwen, Life of the Beloved: Spiritual Living in a Secular World

Permalink | Leave a comment  »

When God asks us to bless others, sometimes all we need is a table – a simple table to invite them to sit with us so we can share our lives. We don’t need a fancy spread, carefully written invitations, or even a lot of forethought. All we need to do is offer a tiny bit of time and space, enough to say, “I care. Come around my table with me for a few moments.” And then just listen. Love them. Laugh with them. Let them have a place at our table.

Pamela A. Chun
©October 21, 2009
Please reprint only with permission.

Permalink | Leave a comment  »

Quote from Philip Yancey’s book Meet the Bible and my thought for the day.

Permalink | Leave a comment  »

A friend and I have been struggling over the issue of fairness.

We struggle over situations when things aren’t “fair,” especially in relationships. We understand the concept of pulling our own weight, of pitching in, of being and taking responsibility—and what gets us raw, impatient, grumpy, and sullen is when others don’t. We ask, “Why do we have to be the Responsible Adult all the time?” Why does it seem that when we ask for forgiveness, it isn’t reciprocated? We feel taken advantage of, taken for granted, asked to pitch in even more when we already feel we have given our fair share and probably even more into a situation. We often end up having to suck it up, while “they” luxuriate in their own little worlds.

Not fair, Lord, we complain—and we are tired. You know it would be so much easier if each person did their fair share; or better yet if every person went overboard in giving to a relationship. If each person contributed 60%, added up in a two-person relationship, we’re way over 100! But. But, Lord, they’re not doing 60%. Heck, it feels like their not even doing 50% and most of the time it’s a stretch to see they are putting in much more than 40%

Lord, if everything were done by everyone fairly, the world would be such a better place. And if every one did even just a little more than what was fairly required — say, 51% — everything would be swelling in abundance

But that’s not what happens. Life isn’t fair. Circumstances get thrust upon us. We are perceived as strong and confident: competent, and once again the scales are imbalanced. We do more because we can. And yet, that is what God calls us to do, and to do it freely, do it unfairly.

Here’s what our friend and author Philip Yancey says:

To understand this issue of human freedom, it may help to imagine a world in which everyone truly does get what he or she deserves. That world would be just and consistent, and everyone would clearly know what God expected. Fairness would reign. There is, however, one huge problem with such a tidy world: it's not at all what God wants to accomplish on earth. God wants from us love, freely given love, and we dare not underestimate the premium God places on that love. Freely given love is so important that God allows our planet to be a cancer of evil in the universe—for a time.

If this world ran according to fixed, perfectly fair rules, there would be no true freedom. We would act rightly because of our own immediate gain, and selfish motives would taint every act of goodness. In contrast, the Christian virtues described in the Bible develop when we choose God and God's ways in spite of temptation or impulses to do otherwise.

God wants us to choose to love freely, even when that choice involves pain, because we are committed to God, not to our own good feelings and rewards. God wants us to cleave, as Job did, even when we have every reason to deny God hotly. Job clung to God’s justice when he was the best example in history of God’s apparent injustice. He did not seek the Giver because of gifts; after all gifts were removed, he still sought the Giver.

[Where Is God When It Hurts pp 89-91]

Fairness obliviates freedom, obliterates love. Fairness forces people to respond out of fairness and obligation, responsibility and justice — and not out of love. When fairness rules, we set the conditions for love and we’ve can no longer run to God for mercy, grace, blessing.

  Pamela A. Chun
©October 21, 2009
Please reprint only with permission.

Permalink | Leave a comment  »

Yesterday’s post cited Paul’s Letter to the Romans, who to bless and how to bless, and specifically how to respond to evil (Romans 12:9-21). It’s very practical advice that ends with if your enemy is hungry, feed him, thirsty give him something to drink, overcome evil with good.

Practical advice that sounds easy enough. But is it easy? I don’t think so, especially since often the people whom we consider our enemies are those whom we feel have hurt us, harmed us, left us angry, sad, and cheated.

But it’s not only Paul who writes this. Jesus himself says:
38"You have heard that it was said, 'Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth. 39But I tell you, Do not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. 40And if someone wants to sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. 41If someone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles. 42Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you. (Matthew 5:38-41)

We want to say to Jesus, “It’s not fair!” If we feel hurt, why should we have to turn the other cheek? If we’ve been cheated, why should we let them cheat us more? Why can’t we just leave them alone and let them leave us alone? They already have our tunic, why give away our cloak?

I was thinking a lot about this today because this morning, God told me how to go the extra mile with someone who stood on the other side of the fence from me, someone, to borrow Jesus’ words in Matthew 5:11, who had insulted me, persecuted me and falsely said all kinds of evil against me.

Yesterday, God asked me to bless this person and then gave me an in-your-face opportunity to do that, which I did, and which blessed me. Today, God then asked me to bless that person again—this time not with a hard-to-ignore immediate situation, but he instead showed me an opportunity then asked me to go out of my way to take the initiative. Yesterday, he put that person directly in my path and said, “Here, bless him.” Today, he said, “Here’s another opportunity that will make you go out of your way, that will require you to track him down yourself and bless him.”

"But my cloak, Lord, my cloak!" I protested…then gave it away anyway.

I then discovered something. After I did it, I felt good, I felt fine. In fact, I felt better than fine, I felt filled. I discovered I didn’t need my cloak! I wasn’t cold. The thing that I had held onto so tightly for years to cover me, keep me warm, be my protection, hide under, give me dignity, show me self-worth, make me blend in with everyone else…wasn’t necessary. I didn’t need it anymore – once I gave it away.

The opportunity to bless our enemies often comes cloaked. We don’t recognize it for what it is. We think it will be hard and cost us too much, when in the end it doesn’t cost us a thing.

Pamela A. Chun
©October 20, 2009
Please reprint only with permission.

Permalink | Leave a comment  »

A light bulb went on in my head today as I was listening to yet another Francis Chan podcast, “Motivating Through Grace” [Download from iTunes here]. In it, Francis speaks of how we can live through the stress and anxieties of life because of the grace of God – and he quotes the apostle Paul’s letter to the Galatians 6:9-10 about 0:40 in:

9 Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.  10 Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people……

This, I realized, was the essence of showing unconditional love to others — not loving them in spite of the condition of their heart, but loving them in spite of the condition of my heart. Unconditional love is about loving others even when I am weary, even when I am tired, even when I am grumpy, weak, wanting, spent: loving them even when I don’t feel like loving them.

I have forever thought of unconditional love only in terms of the condition of others. I have thought that it only meant that God loves me despite my condition and therefore I should love others despite theirs: despite how imperfect they are, never mindful of their being nasty and needy, selfish and silly, forgetful and frustrating, unreasonable and unwilling, judgmental and jealous, sick and supercilious, hurt, potentially harmful, crazy, nuts, misinformed, stubborn, unthoughtful, self-centered, spiteful, cynical, depressed, critical…hard to love.

That still holds true. However, that takes the higher position of assuming that I am doing them a favor by loving them in spite of themselves.

Today, I realized that unconditional love also means loving others in spite of myself. Paul says in essence, “Are you tired? Do good anyway.” I would elaborate on that to say: Am I feeling inconvenienced, not up to it, begrudging, taken advantage of, misunderstood, drained? Am I less than willing? Love anyway. Love without regard to the condition of my heart because that is true love, God’s type of love —love that loves even when I don’t find it easy.

It’s not up to me to point out the condition of other people’s hearts. That’s called judgment. But it is up to me to love when I don’t feel like it, without condition. That’s unconditional love, and that’s grace.

Prayer and contemplation:
Who am I stopping from giving love to because I feel like it? Have I put myself on a sabbatical from love because I feel burned out from loving too much, as if that were possible? Show me, Lord, how to love unconditionally, freely, without stopping to decide if I am ready or they are worthy. Holy Spirit, examine my heart and my intentions and free me to love despite myself.

Read the full passage and all of Paul’s letter to the Galatians here:
http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Galatians+6&version=TNIV

Pamela A. Chun
©October 18, 2009
Please reprint only with permission.

Permalink | Leave a comment  »

Slow Down And Show Grace by Francis Chan   (16075 KB)
Listen on posterous

Today is the first day of our church’s traditional fall fast. We spend 40 days incorporating a spiritual discipline into our lives that will help us grow in God and break the fast on Thanksgiving. Some people fast from specific foods, or refrain from habits; some go cold turkey on coffee, sweets, alcohol, television, sarcasm, or buying unnecessary items. Other incorporate a new practice into their lives: finding someone in need to help every day, exercise mixed with prayer, reading a devotional or spending more time with God.

It’s become my habit to ask God what he would suggest for my fast. And this time I felt he told me to focus on blessing. Learn about what it means to bless and practice it. Bless someone everyday: someone whom I struggle to love, someone whom I have overlooked or not given that much thought to, or on a given day someone I care about deeply and want to bless even more.

I started by listening to a message by our friend Francis Chan called “Slow Down and Show Grace.” Francis is pastor of Cornerstone Church in Simi Valley, CA, and he speaks frequently for my nonprofit ministry Hawaiian Islands Ministries. What I love about Francis is how authentic and transparent he is about where he is on the journey with Jesus. This message really spoke to me and was one of the catalysts that pointed me to make this a 40 Day Fast of Blessing. I hope you’ll take time to listen to it, too.

First 15 min is devoted to a guest speaker. Francis’ main message begins at 0:15 in to the podcast.
If you enjoyed Francis’ message, consider subscribing to the podcast. Both audio and video versions are available on iTunes.

Permalink | Leave a comment  »

Gosh, I’m humbled but mystified that my March 4, 2009 post, Why I Need Forgiveness, has had more than 2300 hits, with 200 in just the last week. Thank you to whomever is passing my writing along. I’m glad you’re finding it helpful on your personal journey. And if you are passing it along, uh, can you tell me who you are so I can thank you? Thank you.

Pam

Permalink | Leave a comment  »

There are pictures that can break my heart
And songs that make me weep
And stories of my fellow man
That bring me troubled sleep.
There are moments when my aching soul
Could wrench itself and flee
To search in new horizons
For some tranquility.
There are friend I know that give me pain
And make me realize
A price is paid for caring
That’s often sorely high.   —Vas

[My yellowed newspaper clipping that my dad sent me when I was in college.]

Permalink | Leave a comment  »

I have a scar on my chin.
I got it when I fell down when I was 12 years old. It runs along the bottom of my chin where you can’t see it. It’s almost flat but I can feel it when I rub my fingers along it, a very slight hump right at my jaw. I don’t look to see if it’s there, but I can feel it, and that’s enough.

I got the scar while walking the dog—a bassett hound, one of those lazy looking dogs with long, draggy ears, hotdog body, short legs, sad eyes. The dog and I were coming home early evening from the park down the street, heading uphill to the house, hurrying to get to a Friday night high school football game.

The dog was on my right. We were running side-by-side straight up the sidewalk, having just crossed the street, the house maybe ten yards away—when out of nowhere a cat dashed across our path. The cat flew left, the dog followed likewise and ran in front of me. But I kept running straight ahead, tripping over the dog and leash and landing smack on my chin.

Pulling myself off the concrete in the dim evening light, I yanked the dog back and stumbled home. My dad met me in the driveway. He had just pulled his car into the garage and heard me walk up. Shook up, shocked, numb, my chin throbbing, I had no idea of how badly I was hurt until he asked what happened to me, took my head into his hands, turned my chin up, and stuck his thumb into a gaping, bloody gash.

He didn’t say much, only that he had to stitch me up. He acted quickly, without hesitation, grabbed something for the blood, and got me into his car. I don’t remember anything about the ride to the hospital, but we went straight to ER, where the nurses let my dad the orthopedic surgeon have an area to work, no questions asked. There, he cleaned the wound, filled a syringe with xylocaine, injected it into the cut with a long, sharp needle, and meticulously sewed up my chin. Then he took me to the football game.

I recall at the time being really mad at my sister (the dog was her dog, but she, being three years older and in high school, had been allowed to go ahead to the football game with her friends…while I walked the dog). I remember being mad at my mom for making we walk the dog, mad at the dog, mad at the cat, mad at the awkward bandage that encased my chin.

But I don’t think on those things anymore. The gash healed, a week later my dad took the sutures out, I stopped being angry at my sister, the dog got old and died. All that’s left is the scar, and now, years later, I realize I’m glad I have it.

The nature of scars
We all have scars – burn scars, surgical scars, disfigurements from sports injuries, motor vehicle accidents, battle scars. We also have scars from emotional wounds, injuries of the deepest kind that often go untended because no one can see them. How well the wounds heal, how well the scars form, depends on…us. It depends on whether we want to be healed, whether we allow others to help us, whether we put ourselves into the hands of a healer—or if we refuse to acknowledge we’re hurt or do things that aggravate the injury.

My dad was a healer. He had a gift for medicine and surgery. His surgical residents used to recount how precisely, neatly, and quickly he could pin a hip: good placement, firm hand, accurate strokes, clean close. Done.

But he was more than a good technician with skilled hands. He was a healer at heart who loved people and to whom God gave a spiritual gift of healing. I cannot count the number of times patients would take leave of his office, tears of gratitude in their eyes, and stop and tell my sister and I at the front desk what a good man our father was. I’ve no idea what he said to them, not being privy to doctor-patient conversations, but seeing the relief on his patients’ faces told me he didn’t just set fractures and repair meniscus tears, but went beyond to touch something deeper than bone and sinew. As a trained physician, he was taught to observe and listen in order to heal; and as a healer with God’s eyes and ears he saw and heard more than physical pain.

Not just what we do but who we are
My dad helped show me that the gift of healing is not just what we do, but who we are. It’s easy to put a Band-Aid on a cut, or throw an icepack on a muscle, or tape a finger to a splint. The human body is made to heal, regenerate blood, grow new tissue. But what is not easy is taking the time to look beyond the obvious presented symptoms, to touch, to care, to listen to those who hurt for what really pains them, to see what lies beneath their eyes, and then to walk alongside and help them invite God The Healer to do the rest.

Healing is God’s ter ritory. It’s what He wants to do, it’s what He does best. He does it because He loves us. He wants to pick us off the ground and mend the gaping holes, rout out the infection, reset our broken bones and restore our crushed spirit. He wants to help us move freely with strength, show us how to use our muscles to their best capacity, run farther, jump higher, sprint faster, and breath His air.

The prophet Isaiah so magnificently writes:

      [28] Have you not known?
      Have you not heard?
      The everlasting God, the LORD,
      The Creator of the ends of the earth,
      Neither faints nor is weary.
      His understanding is unsearchable.
      [29] He gives power to the weak,
      And to those who have no might He increases strength.
      [30] Even the youths shall faint and be weary,
      And the young men shall utterly fall,
      [31] But those who wait on the LORD
      Shall renew their strength;
      They shall mount up with wings like eagles,
      They shall run and not be weary,
      They shall walk and not faint. [Isaiah 40:28-31, New King James version]

This is a picture of healing, a picture of wholeness that becomes our experience when we turn our heads to recognize the Creator God. And we who have experienced His healing and strength are often called, always called, to be the connection points that show how much God desires to give this extraordinary healing to every person that He has created and loves.

That’s what I love about my scar.
My scar reminds me not that I was wounded but that I was healed. It is a tattoo of my father’s love, which now in his absence, shall forever remain a tangible remnant, an indelible mark of his healing touch and imprint on my life.

Scarred for life
It has also become a metaphor for me for what all scars should be – reminders of a healing and not a recollection of a hurt. I believe that God can and wants to do that for all of our hurts, the one’s bleeding and visible, and the ones buried and painfully immobilizing: He wants to see us walk in wholeness. He desires to change us with His healing. He wants to scar us for life with His love.

Pamela A. Chun
©July 5, 2009
Please reprint only with permission.

Permalink | Leave a comment  »